It’s been a long time since I had a job with deadlines and outside commitments. A long time since I had to discipline my mind to focus, my body to be still, and my fingers to type. The last 10 years have been a lot more about do than think. Probably a good thing since there were days I had a hard enough time just figuring out if I’d washed my hair when the kids were babies, but they aren’t little anymore and my life needs to progress just like theirs.
Since last April I’ve slowing been making changes, learning, and adjusting to a new routine. Figuring out how to manage working and my family responsibilities without going crazy. Trying to treat designing like a business but keep my joy and passion for knitting. Like just about everyone it’s a struggle for me. A big one.
I’ve been thinking a lot about finding that joy and having some balance in my life, but then 5 minutes later I’m thinking about all the skills I’d like to improve, the designs waiting for my attention, and how the blinds really need to be dusted. Ack! It’s so easy to spend a week rushing around like the proverbial chicken, working yourself into the ground, yet still not accomplish what’s important. I don’t want to fall into bed exhausted and still not feel good about my day.
In the end one thought sifted to the top. My life isn’t going to fix it's self so I’d better stop whining and come up with a plan. Okay. You can’t get to where you want to be if you don’t know where you’re going. A plan it is.
If you haven’t stopped reading out of total boredom yet I’m guessing it’s because you might have some of the same issues and that you are looking for solutions too. I don’t know if my ideas will work for you but at least you’ll know you’re not the only one having trouble. I believe the experience and wisdom of others goes a long way to lightening any burden and by sharing what little of both I have I’m hoping you might do the same. Plus by putting my plans and thoughts in words and out there for all to see I’m solidifying them and making a public commitment to them. Accountability is a wonderful thing.
Whew! That’s a lot of talk and not a lot of solution so far. So what am I actually doing about the problem? How can I get a handle on distractions and set some goals and priorities? Here’s my list…
1) Write better lists. Every Monday I write 3 lists. Housework – Errands- SRD (Samantha Roshak Designs work). I only write down what I realistically think I can accomplish that week. I do not list things that I have no hope of doing or things that don’t really need to be done that week (that for another list). Every morning I highlight the must do things and add anything new. Must dos get done before anything else, no exceptions.
2) Designate specific days or times for certain tasks. For me Mondays are for housework, paperwork (bills, phone calls, etc..) and planning (calendar & lists updated). Thursdays are for errands. Fridays are for Creativity and SRD only. No paperwork, no cleaning, no answering email or the phone, and Hubby is responsible for dinner (I love Fridays!). Sundays are family days (stay away from the computer).
Brain work is done first thing after the kids go to school (I’m a morning person). Kitchen work, dinner prep, and mail sorting happen during homework time. Dinner is early so I have 3-5 hours of knitting time most evenings.
3) Stop and think. I say this one to my kids all the time but I don’t always do it myself. Take a breath, pause, count to 10, whatever works, but stop rushing headlong into things and keep my goals in mind when making choices. A total duh but I at least am dumb enough to need the reminder.
4)It can wait. This one is probably the hardest for me but makes a huge difference in my productivity and my state of mind when I can remember it. I do not need to read email the second it comes in. I do not need to clean every dish as soon as someone is done with it. It’s ok to not answer the phone or the door (we get tons of solicitors). Just because the kids want you it does not mean you need to drop everything and help them immediately. No one is going to die if you close your office door and tell them to leave you alone for an hour. For at least one hour a day I try to ignore everything else and focus only on my selected task. It’s unbelievable how much you can get done if you don’t start and stop half a dozen times.
5) Break up the big tasks. When I don’t know exactly how to do something or how to start a task I avoid it. It seems overwhelming and I start thinking I’m not going be able to do it so why waste my time trying. I’m pledging to pull my head out of the sand, look the task in the eye and break it down. Make new website is never getting checked off my list. But write out site plan or design new banner will. I can do just about anything one small piece at a time.
6) Waste time. This seems counter to all my other goals but remember I’m trying to find balance. It’s almost impossible for me to relax when there is still work to be done. Problem is there is always work to be done. Always. If there is too much to be done I can get myself completely worked up and downright crabby (or that other b word) with anyone who gets in my way or slows me down. That’s not who I want to be. So at least once I day I’m making my self do something of no value. Just sit and drink my latte (no walking around, no reading email, no packing lunches). Play a game of solitaire. Watch a TV program without knitting (gasp!). Call a friend and just talk. Spend an extra 10 minutes in the shower just cuz it feels good. Read a book.
It’s been two weeks since I started my plan and so far I’m feeling pretty good about it. I’ve gotten more done, felt better about it, and been easier to live with. I’ve heard it takes 12 weeks (or was it 16) to make a new behavior a habit so while I’m off to a good start I’ve got a ways to go to make it a real life change. Cross your fingers for me. Thanks for listening and for being there to keep me honest. I’d love to hear about your strategies for joy and balance in your life if you’re willing to share.
PS – The photos are all of upcoming patterns. I’m hoping to use my new powers of concentration to finish writing them up and get them out to all of you.
